Positively Postnatal

OK. Hear me out here. I know that it's OK to have a bad day, or a bad week, or a bad patch, or whatever. And I know that it's OK to try to normalise the downs as well as the ups. That's life - it isn't always perfect and you do have to take the rough with the smooth. Too often, especially in our social media obsessed, picture perfect society, we only show our friends and family the glossy highlight reel of our lives and we hide the struggles and the flaws. But I think we need to change the conversation a bit. It's OK to admit that you aren't OK. But not being OK sucks. And there is so much help and support out there.  So, it's OK not to be OK - but only if you reach out and get help. It's not OK to not be OK and suffer in silence. You need people to be with you on those not OK days. We need each other. It's also not OK not to be OK if you feel, deep down, that something more is wrong. Listen to your body, and listen to your instincts.  You know your ...

...has an effect on anyone else like it does with me? I'm not just talking about my mood here although I do feel absolutely amazing when the sun is shining and like I want to hibernate in bed all day when the weather is grey. But does anyone else feel almost governed by the weather? For the past two days, I've been getting static shocks whenever I touch certain things - the car, door handles, Lyra, my mother! I think there must be something in the atmosphere at the moment. Sometimes, expecially in the summer, I'll get a really bad headache and I'll know that a storm is coming. Then when the rain hits, I'll have almost instant relief. It can't just be me...can it? Windy weather makes me feel adventurous, snow makes me playful, and don't even get me started on hail! Anyway, roll on summer and the sunny days! I can't wait to not be heavily pregnant in August like I was last year...

I love hedgehogs, I really do. But I didn't think I'd end up impersonating one last week... I'd read in several different places that acupuncture can help with alleviating the symptoms of depression and also of hormonal imbalances. In fact, studies have shown that the combination of acupuncture and antidepressants can even help the medication to be more effective. I think we all know where I'm going with this...I decided to give acupuncture a try. Mum very kindly babysat Lyra whilst I went for my hour of acupuncture. Lyra napped for the entire time, so Mum got lucky there methinks!  I turned up and was shown into a small room. We discussed my symptoms and the Chinese Acupuncturist (his job title, not his ethnicity - he is Welsh!) told me I had liver stagnation. He told me I needed to eat chicken for lunch every day and that I should be totally fine after a few sessions. I was instantly wary because anyone who promises healing of depression within a set amount of time pr...

About a month ago, a workshop was advertised on the Shine page. It was going to be given by Jen, an award winning nutritionist, about female hormonal health and wellbeing. It would be given on a Monday evening on International Women's Day and Shine were offering to pay toward the workshop, so I didn't have to pay as much to take part. I'm not sure what prompted me to do this workshop. I thought I ate OK, although my diet had gone downhill a little and I'd been eating more and more unhealthy foods in an attempt to boost my weight back up. I think seeing the words "hormonal" and "wellbeing" sold it for me though, coupled with my belief that food can be medicine as well as nourishment. That workshop was a game changer. Jen is so knowledgeable and talked the women on that Zoom call through the basics first (for example, the first sign of dehydration is not thirst, but fatigue - it's so simple, but even drinking more water has helped to improve things...

I've been looking forward to writing this blog post. One of the most positive things that has happened to me has been becoming a Shine mummy. I'll explain... Back in January, I was desperately Googling PND recovery stories and feeling as though I wouldn't ever get better. I stumbled across a story written by Lauraine on a website called Shine (link to her story and website is at the bottom of this post. You should read her story - it explains everything I've gone through far more articulately than my ramblings!) Every word she wrote resonated with me - even the fact that she had six blissful weeks with her newborn before the darkness stole in.  The website turned out to be a charity supporting mothers suffering from PND and offered them the chance to attend crafting sessions - a weekly session to explore a new craft in a safe space and in a mindful way. Mothers are referred to Shine through their midwife/Health Visitor/GP etc. I knew I wouldn't be able to attend ses...

I am so so so so so thankful to Sian and the organisers and volunteers of the Freedom Bumps and Babies group. It has kept me going. They are so kind and brave to have run a mum and baby support group throughout this pandemic and throughout lockdowns. They gave us a small scrap of normality in a turbulent time. Going to that group once a week has very often been the highlight of my week. Just being in a room with other women and having a chat is uplifting and comforting. It also led me gently back to my faith. When I was young, I didn't ever feel that I belonged in church. I wasn't as pretty or talented or motivated as the other youths - that's how I felt. I didn't ever feel like I fit in. Now I do. (Sidenote: when I was younger, I wasn't the glamorous and confident Beth you now know. I was sort of gangly, and goofy, and clumsy. Just kidding. I'm still all of those things; now I just own it!)   I lost my faith a bit over the years and now I'm disc...